Time: Sat Dec 06 04:14:00 1997
To: EAGLEFLT <eagleflt@thumb.net>
From: Paul Andrew Mitchell [address in tool bar]
Subject: ;-)!
Cc:
Bcc:
References:
This reminds me of a great quote from
Fredric Hayward, founder of Men's Rights, Inc.,
in Sacramento, California:
"We are more about saving whales
than saving males."
/s/ Paul Mitchell,
Candidate for Congress
http://supremelaw.com
At 05:30 PM 12/5/97 -0700, you wrote:
>>Date: Fri, 05 Dec 1997 14:48:09 -0500
>>From: "Mark A. Smith" <msmith01@flash.net>
>>To: Mark <msmith01@flash.net>
>>Subject: ;-)
>>
>>FUNNY BUMPER STICKERS
>> ---------------------
>>
>> * All men are idiots, and I married their King.
>> * Reality is a crutch for people who can't handle drugs.
>> * Where there's a will, I want to be in it.
>> * Few women admit their age; Fewer men act it.
>> * I don't suffer from insanity, I enjoy every minute of it.
>> * We are born naked, wet, and hungry. Then things got worse.
>> * Very funny Scotty, now beam down my clothes.
>> * Be nice to your kids. They'll choose your nursing home.
>> * There are 3 kinds of people: those who can count & those who
>>can't.
>> * Why is 'abbreviation' such a long word?
>>
>> LOBOTOMIES FOR DEMOCRATS?
>> WHY BE REDUNDANT?
>>
>> QUIT HONKING
>> I'M RELOADING
>>
>>
>> HORN BROKEN
>> WATCH FOR FINGER
>>
>> SO MANY PEDESTRIANS
>> SO LITTLE TIME
>>
>> ILLITERATE? WRITE FOR HELP
>>
>> CHANGE IS INEVITABLE
>> EXCEPT FROM A VENDING MACHINE
>>
>> COVER ME
>> I'M CHANGING LANES
>>
>> YOUR KID MAY BE AN HONOR STUDENT BUT YOU'RE STILL AN IDIOT
>>
>> HE WHO LAUGHS LAST THINKS SLOWEST
>>
>> HE WHO HESITATES IS NOT ONLY LOST
>> BUT MILES FROM THE NEXT EXIT
>>
>> THIS IS IT
>> I DON'T HAVE ANOTHER CAR
>>
>> GONE CRAZY
>>> BE BACK SHORTLY
>>
>> HANG UP AND DRIVE
>>
>> I (heart) Cats.
>> They Taste Just Like Chicken.
>>
>> My child has perfect attendence at Jackson State Penitentiary.
>>
>> FUNNY ANSWERING MACHINE MESSAGES
>> --------------------------------
>>
>> The number you have reached: (my phone number) has been changed. The
>>new number
>> is: (same phone number).
>>
>> (Lot of party noise in the background) "What?" (pause) "WHAT? I can't
>>hear you!"
>> (pause) "Wait, I'll turn down the music -- no, I have a better idea,
>>why don't
>> you call back when I am home, or you can leave a message after the
>>beep."
>>
>> Hi this is Nathan, my answering machine is in the shop, but I can take
>>a message
>> and transfer it to the machine when I get it back. Beep.
>>
>> Hello, you've reached Jim and Sonya. We can't pick up the phone right
>> now, because we're doing something we really enjoy. Sonya likes doing
>> it up and down, and I like doing it left to right...real slowly. So
>> leave a message, and when we're done brushing our teeth we'll get back
>> to you.
>>
>> Hi. This is John. If you are the phone company, I already sent the
>> money. If you are my parents, please send money. If you are my
>> financial aid institution, you didn't lend me enough money. If you are
>> my friends, you owe me money. If you are a female, don't worry, I have
>> plenty of money.
>>
>> Please leave a message. However, you have the right to remain
>> silent. Everything you say will be recorded and will be used by us.
>>
>> Hi. I'm probably home, I'm just avoiding someone I don't like. Leave
>> me a message, and if I don't call back, it's you.
>>
>> If you're a burglar calling to see if I'm at home, I'm sitting here
>> in the dark with 2 snarling Dobermans and a loaded 12 ga. shotgun.
>> If you're not go ahead and leave a message.
>>
>> Hi this is you know who, and we're not you know where. So
>> leave a message at the you know what.
>>
>> We might be out, taking a walk,
>> Or we could be home and not want to talk.
>> If you're a friend, please speak at the tone,
>> If you're a salesman, GET OFF MY PHONE!
>>
>> Congratulations! You are the 10th caller.
>> Please leave your name and phone number, and
>> we will award your prize.
>>
>> We're not home, but our dogs are - come on over. (growl sounds)
>>
>> This is Bob. I'm out at the beach--uh, I mean, [cough, cough] I'm home
>> sick from work. [cough, cough] Leave a message and I'll call you when I
>> get ba--can get to the phone. [cough, cough]" <BEEP>
>>
>> Leave a mess- (fake beep) -age at the tone. <BEEP>
>>
>> ___________________________________________________________________
>>
>>
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