Time: Wed Dec 10 06:48:50 1997 To: From: Paul Andrew Mitchell [address in tool bar] Subject: SLS: Great Moments in Journalism Cc: <pnpj@db1.cc.rochester.edu> Bcc: sls, friends, liberty lists, 3cc, psc, Norm Vroman References: a/k/a "The Yellow Bucket Awards [tm]" soon to be announced for stellar print corruptions in the state zone! [We already know about the federal zone:] We orchestrate the electrons, and you peons get to crush the ink under your stinky feet. [Not a quote!] /s/ Paul Mitchell, Candidate for Congress http://supremelaw.com p.s. Blinking sign seen atop L.A. Times Mirror building: DO NOT DRINK YELLOW PAINT (we already tried it, YUCK!) Champagne anyone? (Isn't that in Illinois?:) <snip> > >Some classic moments in journalism: > >Jon Snow: "In a sense, Deng Xiaoping's death was inevitable, wasn't it?" >Expert: "Er, yes." (Channel 4 News) > >"As Phil De Glanville said, each game is unique, and this one is no >different to any other." (John Sleightholme - BBC1) > >"If England are going to win this match, they're going to have to score a >goal." (Jimmy Hill - BBC) > >"Beethoven, Kurtag, Charles Ives, Debussy - four very different names." >(Presenter, BBC Proms, Radio 3) > >"Cystitis is a living death, it really is. Nobody ever talks about it, but >if I was faced with a choice between having my arms removed and getting >cystitis, I'd wave goodbye to my arms quite happily." >(Louise Wener (of Sleeper) in Q Magazine) > >"Julian Dicks is everywhere. It's like they've got eleven Dicks on the field." >(Metro Radio Sports Commentary) > >Listener: "My most embarrassing moment was when my artificial leg fell off >at the altar on my wedding day." >Simon Fanshawe: "How awful! Do you still have an artificial leg?" >(Talk Radio) > >Interviewer: "So did you see which train crashed into which train first?" >15-year-old: "No, they both ran into each other at the same time." >(BBC Radio 4) > >Presenter (to palaeontologist): "So what would happen if you mated the >woolly mammoth with, say, an elephant?" >Expert: "Well in the same way that a horse and a donkey produce a mule, we'd >get a sort of half-mammoth. >Presenter: "So it'd be like some sort of hairy gorilla?" >Expert: "Er, well yes, but elephant shaped, and with tusks." (GLR) > >Kilroy-Silk: "Did you mean to get pregnant?" >Girl: "No. It was a cock-up." > >Grand National winning jockey Mick Fitzgerald: "Sex is an anti-climax after >that!" >Desmond Lynam: "Well, you gave the horse a wonderful ride, everyone saw >that." (BBC) > <snip>
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