Time: Thu Mar 20 04:34:55 1997 by primenet.com (8.8.5/8.8.5) with ESMTP id VAA12736; Wed, 19 Mar 1997 21:04:11 -0700 (MST) by usr06.primenet.com (8.8.5/8.8.5) with SMTP id VAA03728; Wed, 19 Mar 1997 21:03:08 -0700 (MST) Date: Thu, 20 Mar 1997 04:29:53 -0800 To: (Recipient list suppressed) From: Paul Andrew Mitchell [address in tool bar] Subject: SLS: Short Beach with Long Pier (satire update:) "This comedy break brought to you by Too Lite Batteries and BeachKraft -- we land anywhere you want!" In a startling development, the August Council of Short Beach with Long Pier today announced preliminary consent decrees, initially drafted in Mandarin, permitting the Long Pier to reach Formosa and Hong Kong. The Hong Kong connection will be particularly lucrative for Short Beach, since British rule will soon terminate. Short Beach Council is contemplating an interim offer to assume government of the tiny enclave of "brisk" businesses concentrated there. Short Beach Council members are busy studying a crash course in Hong Kong business ethics [sic]. The course crashed, however, when the NeverReady batteries failed in the PacMan simulation which is used to deliver study materials to Internet-based diskless workstations with factory re-con Intel 8088 clones. Not to be outdone, the red money saved on recycled parts was donated to the Fund for Red House Furnishings and Rare Persian Frescoes, which is run from a hall adjacent to the Oval Office. The dwelling was once known as the White House. The CPU's turned up only last year in an abandoned shipping container hidden in a BeachKraft King Air twin turbo which landed by mistake at Miramar Naval Air Station. It seems the private pilot became confused by the UN flag flying over the control tower, and he thought he had arrived in New York City, so he switched to English, the preferred language for air traffic control prior to the international conversion to ancient Mandarin. However, the tower ordered him down with hand signals which air traffic controllers flashed onto a movie screen, using a new brand of flashlights manufactured in Hong Kong's Too Lite sector, whereupon the pilot confessed to having been lost in Hong Kong for 15 years, without a compass, searching for his kidnapped baby. The pilot was amazed to learn that he could now return to Hong Kong on foot, over Long Pier with thumb out. If you can figure all of this out, you are smarter than US! Film at 11. Adults only, please. /s/ Paul Mitchell ======================================================================== Paul Andrew, Mitchell, B.A., M.S. : Counselor at Law, federal witness email: [address in tool bar] : Eudora Pro 3.0.1 on Intel 586 CPU web site: http://www.supremelaw.com : library & law school registration ship to: c/o 2509 N. Campbell, #1776 : this is free speech, at its best Tucson, Arizona state : state zone, not the federal zone Postal Zone 85719/tdc : USPS delays first class w/o this ========================================================================
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